Parents Autistic Children

Finding time for leisure, for parents with a child who has autism can be difficult. What is leisure? Many people believe leisure is a way to spend time when there is nothing else to do do. The dictionary defines the true meaning of leisure as,” freedom from demands of work or duty, time available, for recreation or relaxation, spare time.”

Parents can find leisure time for themselves, even though they may have a child with autism. This is done by realizing, there is a difference between having leisure time and engaging in a leisure activity. Some leisure time could be filled with dysfunctional activities that have no enjoyment.

Often times parents will feel guilty if they spend leisure time to enjoy themselves, or do something out of the ordinary that requires fun, relaxation and do exactly what you want without pressure, or forced to do it. You as a parent must overlook feeling guilty, so you can find time for leisure.

It is imperative for you, not to to feel guilty by taking leisure time. It is healthy to find leisure time for yourself, even though you have an autistic child. In addition, it is also healthy for your child to understand, you are a person with needs and you also must fulfill them. Parents Autistic Children

Often parents with a child who has the disorder of autism feels they are not doing enough for their child. They fill their day with so much attention towards their child, and sometimes forget about themselves to take time for leisure.

Yes, a child with autism for the most part, requires high maintenance and attention that should not be overlooked. But, you as a parent should not be overlooked either, when it comes to finding time for leisure.

You might want to take a walk, look at the stars at night on the patio with a cup of coffee when your child is in bed. Go to a movie that is a comedy, or rent one and watch it with the door closed, with no disruptions. Getting a book that you have always wanted to read, but did not have the time or did not have the place for leisure. You may want to walk through a park, go to a zoo, enjoy the flowers, watch other people sitting on a park bench. For me, I love to take a drive near a lake and watch sailboats, with my feet up on the patio furniture. It is soothing and relaxing.

There are numerous things you can do for leisure. Be creative, and find out what you enjoy, want to do and are able to for yourself, even though your child has autism. You may have to adjust your schedule or find another person who is familiar with autism to watch your child, while you find time to enjoy your leisure time.

It is healthy, both mentally and physically for you as parents and your child with autism to find leisure time. You will be more relaxed, enjoyable, more rejuvenated to take on new and challenging tasks. Parents Autistic Children

“Parents Autistic Childrenis a proven Autism Solution for your Child.

TryAutism, Aspergers, ASD Program and change child’s life forever!”

No related posts.

There was a day when being a single parent earned public scorn. The assumption was that you must be immoral to have ended this way. But times have changed. The past decades have seen a dramatic increase in the number of single-parent households, and there’s no stigma attached to the status today.

Single parents who are facing financial hardships can find help today. Society is recognizing that “it takes a village to raise a child,” and governments are providing more financial assistance for families in financial distress.

And the help is not limited to white Americans. Black single parents face the same challenges and hardships as any other single parents, and government assistance programs are color-blind.

For example, black single parents in Arkansas can apply for a special scholarship program that helps them attend college. The attend school for free and receive a stipend every month to help meet expenses. The State of Arkansas believes that children will grow up to be better citizens if their parent is better educated. And Arkansas does not require both parents to be present to recognize a family. Single-parent families are as important in Arkansas as any family unit.

Black single parents who are unemployed can also get help from state and local governments to find a job. Employment offices will try to find work near the home for single parents who must also manage their household. In fact, they may offer financial assistance while the black single parent is job hunting.

To find sources of assistance in your state or community, check the blue section of your yellow pages. Look for family assistance, unemployment, and children’s welfare agencies and departments, and start calling. It may take some time to find that one person who really cares, but you will find help if you are patient and persistent.

Some local governments will advise both white and black single mothers to work from the home to give them more time to care for their children. The Internet offers opportunities to earn supplemental income from home. It’s not just a dating service! If you have the determination to learn and the patience to persist, you can earn a living from the Internet.

Online shopping services rake in millions, if not billions, of dollars every day. Selling their products through your own website can earn you commissions. There are also many opportunities to find work as a virtual secretary, writer, host for a forum, or a survey poller. And with a little help, you can sell your own products and services over the web. Having your name and number show up when someone queries for a local service is a great way to find additional work.

Trying to earn a living to support your family while also caring for your children is a stressful full-time job. As a single black parent, you may need to find some support to help you cope with daily stresses and the transition from one way of life to another.

Group therapy sessions are a great way to find a listening ear and emotional support when you are going through these struggles. The other group members are in the same situation, so they understand you and your problems. They can offer advice based on lessons they’ve learned while dealing with the same issues. Your local government may even sponsor such a group. Check out local services to see if that free service is available to you.

Support and therapy groups can help solve problems before they even come up. Group members know what you’re going through because they’ve been there. They may be able to help you build strong healthy relationships with your children. They may have solutions to household repair problems that you didn’t think of. If you don’t have a network of close friends to play that role, you may find a single parent group the perfect support system.

Black single parents need to take advantage of all the opportunities and services their state and local governments offer. It’s time to let go of that stubborn pride and admit you can’t do it all alone. Your children need a happy healthy parent, and you need to be there for them. If you don’t take advantage of the programs out there, you’ve cheated yourself and your family.

Abhishek is a family counselor and he has got some great Single Parenting Secrets up his sleeves! Download his FREE 65 Pages Ebook, “Single Parenting – Becoming The Best Parent For Your Child!” from his website http://www.Better-Parent.com/126/index.htm. Only limited Free Copies available.

No related posts.

Young children & elderly parents. Being having young children or elderly parents at home is another reason for working at home because some people are looking to combine parenthood with their career. In fact, studies regularly show that many parents would rather stay at home with their children if they could. A home office presents a perfect opportunity for them to have more freedom. In addition, the cost of a ‘nanny’ or a home daycare may be too high on a low wage, or parents may not wish to leave their young children regularly with someone else whose primary reason is to spend more time with their children. When child care is in the house, parents can have lunch with their kids or take breaks to play with them for few minutes. Full time child care and elderly home care can be expensive. If you are just starting up your business or need your full work at home income to make ends meet, then full time child care is probably not an option for you.

Retirement or redundancy. Some people may have taken ‘early’ retirement before the state of pension age and feel the need for some extra cash. As an older worker, however, you will feel that the chance of starting in a new salaried position in a new environment is remote, to say at least. You don’t want to dig up your roots and move elsewhere, don’t you? At this stage, part time work at home or owning a home based business would be the right choice. Additional income while working in the comforts of your home – priceless.

Lower cost. With fuel prices heading towards new heights all the time, everything is going to be more expensive, especially transportation cost. It does not matter if you drive, take the bus or take the subway to work, the bottom line is, it is going to get more expensive. Well, one solution is to spend more time and energy and start walking to work! Another more sensible and practical solution is to work from home. Can you imagine the amount of money you will spend on clothing’s for work at the office? I did my calculations and it was shocking! Working from home will save all that.

Commuting. Another often very compelling reason for working at home is that you’re finding the life of a commuter too much to bear. The public transport never arrives on time and you have to choose between leaving home at some ungodly hour before sunrise to arrive hours before anybody else gets into their workplace. Or, you spend hours driving around eating up fuel looking for a parking lot? Sitting in a traffic that can hardly move? What about squeezing with everyone else on that packed bus or train for hours? Surely, there’s something you can do which will improve your life style. You’ve had enough. You’ll work from home.

An unmanageable boss. Do you ever work under a boss who thinks he is always right and your ideas are always left in the air? His or her management skills are no longer used by other peak performing companies. Simply put, his or her methods are out of date. Communications between him or her and the staff have degraded and the true potential of the staff cannot be fulfilled. Same routine for work everyday looks like dressing uniforms for you. You know there’s no chance for you to climb above your boss’s head, moreover, there’s still 30 years to go until retirement. Thinking of suffering 30 more years? No way! If you are trapped with such a boss, fight back! How? Look for new opportunities to start out on your own. Such reasons for beginning a business often produce very good results. When you run your own business, you are the master. You take all the decisions and get all the rewards. Start working for yourself, not for someone else!

Stress is another factor. A looming deadline, work overload, a demanding client, a vague manager or a constantly ringing phone… The most stressful jobs are, no surprisingly, the ones in which you are under a lot of pressure and have very little control over your schedule. You might need to cut down meetings or get an assistant. A period of excessive work can lead to emotional and physical burn-out. Some people often feel that they must work for long period of times. For example in UK, most people work over 46 hours per week, that’s much more compare to any other EU countries. This is always linked to a perception that it is necessary to be seen as working long hour in order to justify a decent salary. Unlike working at home, you set your own hours and work when you want if you have a good time management.

Tax deduction. Working at home and owning a home based business reaps many wonderful tax deductions that other businesses may not claim. If you live in the United States, did you know that even if your home business doesn’t make a penny, it can put $5000 or more in your pocket every year in legal tax write-offs? It’s true! Many expenses related to your business can be added to your tax deduction such as your advertising cost, either newspaper ads or magazines ads you run, internet access and long distance calls or other business expenses, keep your receipts for each bill paid. These are items that may be written off. Just be sure to consults your accountant or tax advisor to see if you are qualified for the deductions.

Bibi Liew, a Work At Home Expert helps to assist you in finding the right
work at home business opportunity or starting an online business. Visit
her 2007 Top Work At Home Directory at http://www.work-at-home-sites.com
or her Home Based Business Directory: http://www.ebusiness-insights.com

No related posts.

We often don’t give importance to minor things thinking they won’t matter. But at times, some things look very minor but their outcome can be really powerful. Here are some of the efforts which can alter the equation between you and your child.  

Pat your child when he loses: May it be failure in the class, or on the field, speak words of encouragement to your child .The trust and confidence in your relationship will go to another level. After all, words of encouragement during failure are more valuable than words of praise after success. 

Give him importance, like a member of the family: Hang his painting in your room or in the office, when you call his friends ask him what should be the menu, take his opinion when you are buying stuff for the house et al. Your child’s self esteem will become so strong that he’ll surely be a winner throughout. 

Share your own experience when your child makes a mistake: When you see your child lying or stealing, or fall to any temptations, share with him the mistakes you made in your life. He’ll know it is all right to make mistakes and that he can share with you anything. 

Appreciate at least one quality in your child everyday: Each day look at what qualities your child possesses and appreciate him, may be for his caring attitude, his dance skills, or his observation power. Praise genuinely and do tell him exactly what and why you are appreciating. Tell him how proud you are of him because of those qualities. You may make small cards to show your appreciation or put up a chart where each star symbolizes appreciation. 

Become his age before bedtime: Jump on the bed, have pillow fights, act silly, crack silly jokes, dance – become a child with your child for sometime. You’ll forget all your day’s stress.

Try these minor things; you’ll see the love deepen and the relationship blossom.

Click here for more Articles…

Mother’s Pride is headed by the renowned educationist and sought after parenting expert Mrs. Sudha Gupta. Her vision encompasses not only children but parents, teachers and the society on the whole.

As an educationist, she has single-handedly revolutionized pre-school education. Her thoughts have inspired parents and teachers to look at early childhood education from a new perspective. Her emphasis on overall development of child and not just academics has opened new window for tiny tots to blossom into extraordinary beings. Now this visionary has set her eyes to transform formal education system through Presidium, a proposed senior secondary school.

As an expert on parenting, she has given parenting its due importance and popularity. She conducts seminars and orientations regularly to guide parents about positive parenting. Her mission to transform parenting does not limit to a few thousand parents whose children pass out of various branches of Mother’s Pride but millions of parents across the country through her publications in leading newspapers and magazines.

As a social activist, Sudha Gupta’s concern for the society and country is evident not only in her writing, but takes practical shape in the form of a NGO called Sparsh.

Sparsh has so far reached out to millions of poor, needy, mentally and physically challenged children as well as generous contributions have been made as aid to families of Kargil martyrs and Tsunami victims.

In just a few years, Mrs. Gupta has achieved more than what would ordinarily take a lifetime.

For more Details

No related posts.

A Termination of Parental Rights (TPR) is a legal action that terminates all of a parents rights to make decisions for a child or to care for that child.

A Termination of Parental Rights may be voluntary or involuntary. All too often parents are pressured into relinquishing their rights based on allegations of abuse, neglect or abandonment. The consequences are significant and long lasting. A parent should never enter into such proceedings unrepresented. The result is often final.

Under Minnesota Statutes, a juvenile court may, upon petition, terminate ALL rights of a parent to a child. It may do so:



with the written consent of a parent who for good cause desires to terminate parental rights (Note: wishing to avoid a child support obligation is not “good cause);

if it finds that one or more of the following conditions exist:



that the parent has abandoned the child;

that the parent has substantially, continuously, or repeatedly refused or neglected to comply with the duties imposed upon that parent by the parent and child relationship, including but not limited to providing the child with necessary food, clothing, shelter, education, and other care and control necessary for the child’s physical, mental, or emotional health and development, if the parent is physically and financially able, and either reasonable efforts by the social services agency have failed to correct the conditions that formed the basis of the petition or reasonable efforts would be futile and therefore unreasonable;

that a parent has been ordered to contribute to the support of the child or financially aid in the child’s birth and has continuously failed to do so without good cause. This clause shall not be construed to state a grounds for termination of parental rights of a noncustodial parent if that parent has not been ordered to or cannot financially contribute to the support of the child or aid in the child’s birth;

that a parent is palpably unfit to be a party to the parent and child relationship because of a consistent pattern of specific conduct before the child or of specific conditions directly relating to

the parent and child relationship either of which are determined by the court to be of a duration or nature that renders the parent unable, for the reasonably foreseeable future, to care appropriately for the ongoing physical, mental, or emotional needs of the child. It is presumed that a parent is palpably unfit to be a party to the parent and child relationship upon a showing that the parent’s parental rights to one or more other children were involuntarily terminated or that the parent’s custodial rights to another child have been involuntarily transferred to a relative under section 260C.201, Subd 11, paragraph (e), clause (1), or a similar law of another jurisdiction;

that following the child’s placement out of the home, reasonable efforts, under the direction of the court, have failed to correct the conditions leading to the child’s placement. It is presumed that reasonable efforts under this clause have failed upon a showing that:



(i) a child has resided out of the parental home under court order for a cumulative period of 12 months within the preceding 22 months. In the case of a child under age eight at the time the petition was filed alleging the child to be in need of protection or services, the presumption arises when the child has resided out of the parental home under court order for six months unless the parent has maintained regular contact with the child and the parent is complying with the out-of-home placement plan;

the court has approved the out-of-home placement plan required under section 260C.212 and filed with the court under section 260C.178;

conditions leading to the out-of-home placement have not been corrected. It is presumed that conditions leading to a child’s out-of-home placement have not been corrected upon a showing that the parent or parents have not substantially complied with the court’s orders and a reasonable case plan; and

reasonable efforts have been made by the social services agency to rehabilitate the

parent and reunite the family It should be noted that that parental right may be terminated prior to one year, or in the case of a child under age eight, prior to six months after a child has been placed out of the home.

It is also presumed that reasonable efforts have failed under this clause upon a showing that:



the parent has been diagnosed as chemically dependent by a professional certified to make the diagnosis;

the parent has been required by a case plan to participate in a chemical dependency treatment program;

the treatment programs offered to the parent were culturally, linguistically, and clinically appropriate;

the parent has either failed two or more times to successfully complete a treatment program or has refused at two or more separate meetings with a caseworker to participate in a treatment program; and

the parent continues to abuse chemicals.









that a child has experienced egregious harm in the parent’s care which is of a nature, duration, or chronicity that indicates a lack of regard for the child’s well-being, such that a reasonable person would believe it contrary to the best interest of the child or of any child to being in the parent’s care;

that in the case of a child born to a mother who was not married to the child’s father when the child was conceived nor when the child was born the person is not entitled to notice of an adoption hearing under section 259.49 and the person has not registered with the fathers’ adoption registry under section 259.52;

that the child is neglected and in foster care; or

that the parent has been convicted of a crime listed in section 260.012, paragraph b,

clauses (1) to (3).



In an action involving an American Indian child, sections 260.751 to 260.835 and the Indian Child Welfare Act, United States Code, title 25, sections 1901 to 1923, control to the extent that the provisions of this section are inconsistent with those laws.





A termination of parental rights requires a high standard of proof and must be proven by clear and convincing evidence. Any person with knowledge of the circumstances may seek to terminate parental rights. The end result of a termination is that the all rights of the parent may be terminated but it does not extinguish that parents responsibility to pay any past balance for child support.

Attorney Maury D. Beaulier is a recognized leader in family law and criminal defense issues in Minnesota and Wisconsin. He can be reached at his website The Minnesota Juvenile Lwaw Center or by calling 612.240.8005.

No related posts.

So you reckon you have problems because your car has broken down or your bills are mounting or whatever. Try being the parent of a troubled teen. Now that is someone with a real problem.

Of course it is wrong to compare concerns but there are many parents who are at their wit’s end because of the behavior of their teenage son or daughter. Their child is out of control. They are defiant, unruly and rude. You have tried all manners of tactics to try and rein them in and get even a civil discussion going but without success. So what can you do? What help is there for struggling even desperate parents?

The first point is most important. Forget about blame and stop being hard on you. It is not your fault. Of course you are not the perfect parent – who is? – And there are things you could have done better but blaming yourself will not help the situation. It’s bad enough having one family member in trouble. Don’t add to the list by turning yourself in a stressed-out, guilt-ridden parent.

Don’t panic and don’t feel alone. If you panic you will not be able to think clearly. Someone needs to remain calm, at least on the outside while your son or daughter goes off the rails. And remember that they are millions of parents going through exactly what you are going through. There’s probably a parent in your street or suburb in the same boat as you.

Doing nothing is not an option. You must get active. Try talking to your child and remember that listening is often far better than speaking. Get in touch with the child’s teachers and your family doctor. Is there a church or club leader you can speak to? You need to discover the cause of the unwelcome behavior. Finding the cause and then removing it is a brilliant way to turn around the life of your troubled teen

If you need to engage a professional therapist then does so. There are no hard and fast rules and every child and every situation is different. Just be open to all possibilities.

Placing your child in an approved institution may be the answer. Could they go to a boarding school? Could they move out of town and live with a relative? Would a wilderness camp, a boot camp or therapy based school be the answer? Investigate all possibilities and discuss them with a trusted source. Obviously your child will need to be consulted but if they point blank refuse to be involved, a firm hand may be required.

You are in a difficult situation when your child turns ugly and threatens you or uses abusive language. As disturbing and as sad as it may be, there are many professional resources available to help you through the crisis. Keep your chin up and seek out help. Many parents get over this problem with a happy ending for all. You can do the same.

For parents that need advice and information on how to help their troubled teens check out Help for Troubled Teens. Or fill out this Troubled Teen Questionnaire to know whether your teen needs help or not.

No related posts.

Around this age, your toddler would be big enough to outgrow the crib. This is an indication that it is time for a toddler bed. However, the transition from a crib to a toddler bed may not be very easy and smooth for the toddler.

Here are some useful tips to ensure your toddler has a smooth transition from a crib to a bed:

Ensure that the bed is very comfortable and inviting. Let the toddler decide on the most suitable bed. Keep things that attract the toddler and toddler likes near the bed. Accustom your toddler to the new bed by keeping it in front of the toddler for some time prior to actually using it. Impress upon the toddler that moving out of the crib is the most wonderful thing to look forward to. Ensure that all the things your toddler enjoys doing, are done in the toddler bed itself. Place the toddler bed in the same position in your house as the crib was. Show your appreciation and excitement of the new toddler bed.

Some Don’ts

If your toddler is just not ready to move to a bed, do not force a transition; forcing your toddler to move out of a crib may result in toddler developing hatred for a bed altogether. Do not make the prospect of moving to a toddler bed a boring or mechanical affair for the toddler. Instead, try to instill excitement in the toddler about the prospect of moving out of the crib.

Paul Banas is a founder of GreatDad.com. He writes articles on parenting, parenting skills, pregnancy and dads, parenting tips, baby names, baby rooms and many more topics related to dads.

No related posts.

If you need advice to get your ex back easily you’ve come to the right place. To get your ex back easily there are few steps you can follow to have more success than just winging it and hoping for the best.  Breakups happens but it doesn’t have to be permanent.  Listed below are advice that will allow you to get your ex back easily by letting your ex know that you are still interested in having them in your life.  This will help to rekindle things between you the right way.

To get your ex back easily try to reach out and let them know that you are still interested on how are they doing.  Playing hard to get is not the best way in trying to win your ex back.  Even though you need to scale back with communication, try to reach out in a subtle way.  Let them know that you still care and that you still wanted them to be a part of your life.

Send them an email.  You can copy them with the casual conversations or updates you send to your friends like jokes, pictures, etc.  If you wanted to send them an email just to see how are they doing, keep it light.  Avoid creepy messages like stalker style poetry or begging for them to comeback.  Start with “hey what’s up” email and work from there.

Another advice to get your ex back easily is to stay away from other men or women who can easily misunderstood that you’ve move on.  Let your ex know that you are serious of getting them back in your life and that no one interests you but him or her.

Remember the important things. Get your ex back easily by letting them know that you are thinking about them.  One easy way is to send her card on her birthday or send her an email asking what did they do for your his or her parent’s anniversary.  This will show your ex that you are thinking about them in a harmless and positive way.

Call or text, use discretion when you do.  Do not be afraid to send them text messages or call every now and then.  This will make your ex to become more comfortable communicating and receiving communication from you. Uncertainty is something that should be avoided in life and love, so

call your ex  up and let him or her know what’s going on so that they will know where you are and what you’re doing, and doesn’t have to imagine that you’re out having fun with possibly a new lover. Let your ex know you care, and that you still think about them. If they know that they are still in your thoughts so frequently, it will contribute heavily to how to get your ex back easily.

These are just the beginning steps on how to get your ex back easily. They are the initial steps T ‘Dub’ Jackson have in his book “The Magic of Making Up” that helped many people like you to get their ex back easily.

Read The Magic of Making Up to discover step by step advice to get your ex back easily.

No related posts.

Even though we need a license to do many things in life — everything from driving and operating a forklift to practicing medicine and fishing — there is no license required to become a parent and this is often the trickiest of all of the above activities!

Parenting today is far more difficult than it was, even a generation ago. Many well-intentioned parents are using outdated and ineffective parenting styles. As a result, they experience daily frustration and stress in their home.

Below you will find my top 7 tips for good parenting. These tips inspire children to want to be well behaved, can reduce family fights and boost family joy.

Good Parenting Tip #1 – If you love your kids—put yourself first!

One of the best things we can do for our children is to give them a foundation for becoming a happy and healthy adult. Self-care should not be a luxury for parents—it needs to become a necessity. You need self-care both for being a good parent and a healthy and balanced human being. Far too many children are living with parents who are stressed out and frankly, not at all fun to be around. If you are repeatedly burning the midnight oil, you may be on the brink of parent burnout—not a pleasant thing for you or your family to experience.

Good Parenting Tip #2 – If married—put your marriage before your kids!

Most of us have heard of Generation X and Generation Y. But did you realize that Generation S—Generation Spoiled—is on the rise? Many children today are raised with an unhealthy sense of entitlement because their parents have made them the center of the universe. With divorce statistics still hovering around 50%, children are far too often coping with unhappy, failing marriages and divorce– much worse for them than missing out on a couple of toys or brand name jeans. Take a stand and put some time into your marriage (like go on a date night)—for your whole family’s sake!

Good Parenting Tip #3 – Cherish your children

No matter what your situation—no matter how often your children drive you crazy—know there are thousands of people in this world who would gladly trade places with you. There are couples who would give anything to just have a child. Strive to remember how truly fortunate you are. Hug your children at least three times a day. Regularly tell them how grateful you are to have the opportunity to be their parent.

Good Parenting Tip #4 – Teach your kids to fish—don’t fish for them!

Many parents do everything for their kids. This only robs their children of the opportunity to learn self-reliance—which is vital to building their self-esteem. One of the best things you can do is to help your kids learn how to do things for themselves. One of the chapters of my first book on effective parenting is called "How To Get Your Kids Doing Their Chores Smiling". Some parents think I am from another planet when I even suggest that kids can learn to do chores with a smile on their face. These same doubting parents are often happily surprised when they see it is possible—in their own home and in this century! Household chores teach basic life skills everyone needs to know. Also, chores give children the opportunity to contribute to the household in a positive and meaningful way.

Good Parenting Tip #5 – Focus on what you like, not on what you don’t

If children aren’t being appreciated and aren’t getting attention for what they do well—and when they behave well—you better believe they will learn to get attention for not behaving well. The more you notice what you like about what they’re doing, the less likely they are to morph into destructive little terrors and the more likely you will inspire your child to repeat the good behaviors and achievements you love.

Good Parenting Tip #6 – Give respect and expect it in return

Don’t do anything to your child that you wouldn’t want your child to do to you. The list of things you don’t want to be doing includes: yelling, hitting, spitting, and put downs. There are far better ways for you to handle conflict, stress and common misbehaviors. Commit to learning these “Ultimate Parenting” tools that are based on mutual respect—not fear based punishment that only teaches our kids to not get caught next time!

Good Parenting Tip #7 – A family that plays together stays together!

Have fun—play with your kids. Laughing, tickling, and enjoying one another’s company is the foundation of a happy home. Having fun can go a long way towards preventing much of the needless conflict and behaviors that drive you crazy. It also provides your family with much needed quality time.

These seven effective parenting tips above are child-proofed, effective and fun. By taking the time to learn how to bring out the best in you and in your children, you will reap the rewards that come from the peace of mind—knowing that you did all you could to support and nurture a happy and healthy family life.

Kelly Nault-Matzen, MA, family counselor, corporate parenting spokesperson and award winning parenting author of When You’re About To Go Off The Deep End, Don’t Take Your Kids With You shares time-tested tools that motivate children to want to be well behaved, responsible and happy! To gain access to more parenting tools and to access your free online parenting course visit www.ultimateparenting.com

No related posts.

Introduction:

Abortion, whether induced or spontaneous, is the termination of pregnancy before the viability of the fetus(usually,20-28 weeks gestation and/or a mass of 500g)1,2. It is a phenomenon that cannot be wished away. Its apparent inevitability has necessitated various jurisdictions adorning it. Despite restrictive laws in many nations, it is carried out on a daily basis, albeit, in unsafe ways.3-5.

 

Initiation of sexual behaviour is a normal part of human development and often occurs in adolescents,6 whose innate environmental and humoral influences encourage sexual activities. Adolescent sexuality and its sequelae are now acknowledged as a major public health, social and economic problem. Poor knowledge of reproductive biology and poor contraception predispose them to unwanted pregancy.7, 8

 

Abortion is among the top five causes of death; only second to puerperal sepsis.9 No issue in medical practice, has in recent time, as abortion, generated such magnitude of controversies, with protagonists and antagonists alike postulating points which surprisingly border on women’s health and reproductive right.

 

Induced Abortion:

Abortion can either be spontaneous or induced 1,2. Spontaneous abortion can be threatened, incomplete or complete, inevitable, missed, septic or habitual/recurrent. Habitual abortion is usually due to a developmental anomaly.10

 

Induced abortion is the leading cause of maternal mortality in most developing nations.6,11,12. Its criminalization has contributed more to this.13. Unsafe abortion in Africa has grave implications, not only for the woman and her future reproductive career, but also her children, family and the community.14,15. Induced abortion represents a serious threat to women’s health and lives.

Since these terminations are in secret, many crude methods are adopted,16-18 ranging from the use of local herbs, instrumentation (dilators and uterine sound), purgatives, alcoholic drinks, caustic agents, to dilatation and curettage, suction and evacuation.

 

It is amusing to note that a histopathologic report19 indicated that a significant proportion of women seeking abortion services are not pregnant. This, underscores the over zealousness of the operators and puts to question their qualification and training.

 

Epidemiology:

Unintended pregnancy is a major reproductive health issue, especially among teenagers. Teenage pregnancy, itself, is associated with age, occupation and little or no education.20, 21. The most affected age group is 15-19, 21-22 Single women and widows; women in polygamous marital relationship, lower parity, with lower education and number of living children; and women with a recent history of domestic violence present for abortion 16,18. Although majority of induced abortion were done by the unmarried age group, married women constitute a significant proportion while students top the chart23.

 

 

Why Induce Abortion? 18,23, 24.

 

Different views quickly come to the fore as to the reason why abortion is induced. Generally, pregnancy is unplanned and therefore unwanted. Others include educational considerations, threat to mum’s life; severely malformed baby; parental incompetence; family’s name and integrity; disputed paternity; personal desire not to have children; baby’s sex; high cost of raising children; short birth interval; out of wedlock sex; cases of rape or sexual abuse; failed contraception; socio-economic consideration and having too many children. These reasons broadly define the categories of abortion seekers.

 

Protagonist Views (In defence of Abortion).

There are healed debates among health-care providers, advocacy groups, policy-makers and legislators in many developing countries where there are restrictive laws on abortion.14, 25-27. This has made some countries to shift grounds (permitting abortion) 28-30; make some modifications13 or remain indifferent.31

 

The reasons, in defence, include:

a. Safety: Abortion is one of the safest medical procedures that if allowed will greatly prevent abortion-related death and injuries which are tragic and easily preventable. 14,31, 32.

b. ‘Feminism’: Protagonists              of this idea believe that male superiority framed the morality, legality and socio-cultural attitudes towards abortion and has denied it as an important status.25,27,31.They propose      that women reclaim their power to choose, including access to safe abortion    services as this violation of women’s reproductive rights is both a cause and manifestation of women                 disempowerment.

 

c. Decrease in maternal mortality: The introduction of Termination of Pregnancy (TOP) act in many developing countries has been associated with massive reduction in maternal mortality ratio (MMR). The involvement of midwives in abortion care has created access to women in remote rural areas.28, 29

 

d. Outdated laws and customs13, 26: This view believes that traditional and cultural values, social perception, religious teachings, remnants of former colonial laws have facilitated stigmatization of abortion and its practitioners. It proposes that in line with recent advancements in technology, that the issue be approached from the perspective that emphasizes the individual’s right to self-determination.

 

An Antagonist’s View

Opponents to induced abortion have presented facts, which unveiled the grave consequences that follow this act.

These include:

a. Breast Cancer: Strong emerging evidences posit an increased breast cancer risk following abortion just as in those on postmenopausal hormone replacement therapy.33

 

b. Post Abortion Syndrome (PAS): This is the emotional, psychological, physical and spiritual trauma caused by an abortion, which is beyond the normal range of human experience34. It is a post traumatic disorder characterized by a stressor (abortion) and physical symptoms such as insomnia and depression, one out of every three patients presenting after an abortion fulfills this criterion.

 

c. Infection: This ranges from the rare septic sacroilitis35, to common ones as post-abortal broad ligament abscess36 and sepsis 12, 37-39. This usually follows the use of unsterilized equipment and an unhygienic operating environment.

 

d. Damage to the visceral organs:    This includes bowel injury40, and the perforation of the uterus (mostly at the fundus, followed by the posterior, anterior and lateral walls) 22.

 

e. Haemorrhage:  This, in the acute phase, could lead to shock, renal shut down or to   anaemia in the long run. It follows the use of sharp objects, herbal medications (leading to endotoxaemia), cervical / vaginal lacerations, excessive endometrial curettage and incomplete abortion15, 39.

 

f. Increased maternal mortality rate (MMR): Abortion is the second leading cause of maternal death (second to haemorrhage). 38, 41-43

 

g. Secondary Infertility: This is the commonest late complication of induced abortion. The fertility rate decreases with increasing number of abortions39, 44. This, in part, is accounted for by structural damage to pelvic organs and chronic pelvic infection.

 

h. A case has been reported of mid-trimester induced abortion using traditional method, which resulted in uterine inversion45. Also, a high prevalence of Chlamydia trachomatis infection is associated with people presenting for TOP46.

 

Conclusion / Advocacy

Weighing the pain and gain of abortion is of paramount importance. The points in favour and against induced abortion, irrespective of the laws and the practitioner centre on women reproductive health. Admittedly, all agree that the legalization of abortion in some countries has not affected its incidence or complications arising therein. This, once again, brings to the fore the need for African nations to understand their root and cherished age-long concept of the family.

 

I therefore, in agreement with some researchers, advocate for the following:-

1. Primary prevention which includes appropriate sexuality education and secondary prevention efforts to prompt diagnosis and treatment of complications, including contraception and other elements of life planning. Parental supervision and proper education of adolescents in goal-setting, decision-making and good value system is strongly advocated in line with African’s concept of the family6, 7.

 

2. Trainingretraining of medical and healthcare professionals to increase awareness of contraception  its options, timing, available methods and usage; safer sex practices; post abortion care; and expanding access to family planning, counseling and quality care 6,15,39,42,47-50.

 

3. Enactment of laws to make adoption of unwanted children easy51.

 

4. Ensuring that research results are shared with appropriate decision-making bodies so as to affect policy and programme advocacy52.

 

Prevention still remains the key. Abstinence among the teenagers and unmarried; and the appropriate use of contraceptives will lessen the burden. Lack of facilities, access and manpower still pose a great challenge. The thought that the proponents of induced abortion are those already born (not aborted) indeed, calls for sheer resentment.

 

 

 

 

References

1. Diejomaoh FME. Abortions in: Agboola A. (Ed) Textbook of Obstetrics and Gynaecology for medical students. Vol. 1. Ibadan Heinemann Educational Books. 2004; 103-126.

 

2. Campbell S, Lees C. (Eds). Obstetrics by Ten Teachers. 17th Edition. New Delhi. Edward Arnold. 2000; 269-271.

 

3. Oye-Adeniran BA, Adewole IF, Umoh AV, et al. Induced abortion in Nigeria: Findings from focus group discussion. Afri. Jol of Repd. Health 2005; 9 (1): 133-141.

 

4. Odunsi SB. Human Rights, Maternal  Deaths and Dehumanization:  Another  look at Nigeria’s  Abortion Laws. Gender and Behaviour. 2004; 2:200-214.

 

5. Mosoko JJ, Delvaux T, Glynn JR, et al. Induced abortion         among women attending antenatal clinics in Yaoundé, Cameroun. East Afri. Medical Jol. 2004;  81(2): 71-77.

 

6. Olukoya P. Reducing maternal mortality from unsafe abortion among adolescents in Africa. Afri. J. Repd. Health. 2004; 8 (1): 56-62.

 

7. Nwokocha ARC. The average Nigerian adolescent sexual life  A challenge. Jol. of  Coll. of Med. 2006; 11(2): 96-100.

 

8. Lema VM. Reproductive awareness behaviour and profiles of adolescent postabortion patients in Blantyre, Malawi. East Afri. Medical Jol. 2003; 80 (7): 339-344.

 

9. Lema VM, Changole J, Kanyighe C. et al maternal mortality at Queen Elizabeth central Teaching Hospital, Blantyre. East Afri. Med. Jol. 2005; 82(1):3-9.

 

10. Saidu SA. Habitual Abortion due to Bicornuate  uterus. Sahel medical journal. 2003; 6(4): 132-133.

 

11. Adamu RMK, Tweneboah E. Reasons, fear and emotions behind induced abortions in Accra Ghana. Institute of African Studies: Research Review. 2004; 20(2): 1-9.

 

12. Goswami A, Kasliwal MR, Lekharaj GH, Urala MS. Maternal  mortality in a 3o care centre in Nepal. Tropical Jol. of Obstet & Gynaecol. 2004; 21: 168-171.

 

13. Lithur NO. Destigmatising Abortion: Expanding community Awareness of Abortion as a Reproductive Health Issue in Ghana. Afri. J. Repd. Health. 2004; 8(1): 70-74.

 

14. Brookman-Amissah E. Woman-centered safe abortion care in Africa. Afri. J. Repd. Health. 2004; 4 (1): 37-42.

 

15. Yeboah RWN, Abortion: The case of Chenard ward, Korle BU from 2000 to 2001. Institute of African Students Research Review. 2003; 19(1):57-66.

 

16. Kaye DK, Mirembe F,  Bantebya G, et al. Reasons, methods and decision-making for pregnancy termination among adolescents and older women in               Mulago hospital, Uganda. East  Afri. Medical Jol.  2005;  82(11):              579-585.

 

17. Dehane KL. Abortion in the North of Burkina Faso. Afri. J. Repd. Health. 1999; 3(2): 40-50.

 

18. Mirembe F., Bantebya G., Johansson A., Ekstrom AM. Reasons, methods  used and decision-making for  pregnancy termination  among  adol. and  older women in Mulago Hospital, Uganda. East African Med. Jol. 2005; 82(11):  579-585.

 

19. Ekanem AD, Etuk SJ, Udoma EJ, Ekanem IA. Fertility profile following induced abortion in Calabar, Nigeria. Trop J. Obstet Gynaecol. 2003; 20:89-92.

 

20. Uwaezuoke ALO, Uzochukwu BSC, Nwagbo DFE, et al. Determination of teenage pregnancy in rural  communities  of Abia State, South East Nigeria. Jol. of Coll of Med. 2004; 9(1): 28-33.

 

21. Harari WS, Fantahun M. Unintended pregnancy and induced abortion in a town with accessible family planning services: The case of narar in Eastern Ethiopia. Ethiopian Jol. of Health Dev. 2006; 20(2): 79-85.

 

22. Nana PN, Fomulu JN, Mbu RE, et al. A four-year retrospective review of postabortal surgical complications at the central maternity Yaounde, Cameroun. Clinics in Mother and child Health. 2005; 2 (2): 349-63.

 

23. Oye-Adeniran BA, Adewole IF, Fapohunda O. Characterics of abortion seekers in south western Nigeria. Afri. Jol Repd. Health. 2004; 4(1):69-72.

 

24. Buga GAB. Attitude of medical students to induced abortion. East African Med. Journal. 2002; 79 (5): 259-262.

 

25. Braam T, Hessini Leila. The power dynamics perpetuating unsafe abortion in Africa. A feminist perspective. Afri. Jol. Reprod. Health. 2004;  8(1): 43-51.

 

26. Sai F. International Commitments and  Guidance in unsafe  abortion. Afri. J. Repd. Health. 2004; 8 (1):15-28.

 

27. Ashenafi M . Advocacy for legal reform for safe abortion. Afri. Jol. Repd. Health. 2004; 8 (1):79-84.

 

28. Mbele AM, Snyman L, Pattinsm RC. Impact of the choice on Termination of pregnancy act on maternal mortality in West of Pretoria. Saf Medical Jol. 2006; 96(11): 1196-1198.

 

29. Sibuyi Mc. Provision of Abortion services by midwives in Limpopo Province of South Africa. Afri J. Repd Health. 2004; 8 (1):75-78.

 

30. Hajri S. Medical Abortion: The Tunisian experience. Afri J of Repd. Health. 2004;8 (1): 63-69.

 

31. Hord C, Wolf M . Breaking the cycle of unsafe abortion in Africa. Afri Jol of Repd. Health. 2004; 8 (1): 29-36.

 

32.Adefuye P, Sule-Odu A, Olatunji AO, et’al. Maternal deaths from induced abortions. Trop. J. Obstet Gynaecol 2003; 20:101-104.

 

33. Okobia MN, Bunker CH. Epidemiological risk factors for breast cancer- A review. Nigerian Jol of clinical practice. 2005; 8 (1): 35-42.

 

34. Rooyen MV, Smith S. The prevalence of post- abortion syndrome in patients presenting at Kalafong Hospital’s family Medicine Clinic after having a termination of pregnancy. SA family practice. 2004; 46(5): 21-24.

 

35. Adesiyan AG, Samaila MOA, Kayode W. Post abortal sacrolitis: a case report. Nigerian Jol of Surgical Research. 2005: 7 (3&4); 317-18.

 

36. Abdul MA, Ameh N Bako AU. Post abortal broad ligament abscess: report of a case. Nigerian Jol. of Surgical Research 2003:5(1&2): 171-173.

 

37. Ratsma YEC, Lungu K, Hofman JJ. Why more mothers die: confidential enquiries into institutional maternal deaths in southern region of Malawi, 2001. Malawi Med Jol. 2005; 17 (3):75-80.

 

38. Fawole AA, Aboveji AP, Akande TM. A review of the complications from unsafe abortiond in Ilorin, Nigeria. The Tropical Jol of  Health Sciences. 2006; 13(1):1-5.

 

39. Ehigieba AE, Ighedosa SU, Emire OF, Onafowokan O. The management challenges of the complications of illegally induced abortions in Benin-city, Nigeria. Sahel Medical Jol. 2004; 7(3): 95-97.

 

40. Oludian OO, Okonofua FE. Morbidity and Mortality from Bowel injury secondary to induced abortion. Afri. Jol Repd. Health. 2003; 7 (3): 65-68.

 

41. Obiechima NJA, Udegbe CB. Maternal Mortality at. St. Charles Borromeo Hospital, Onitsha: A Six Year Review. Orient Journal Of Medicine. 2003; 15 (3&4): 65-68.

 

42. Melkamu Y Enquselassie F, Ali Ahmed, et’al. Fertility Awareness and post abortion pregnancy intention in Addis Ababa, Ethopia. Ethopian J. Health Dev. 2003; 17(3):167-174.

 

43. Ujah IAO, Aisen OA, Mutihir JT, et’al. Factors contributing to maternal mortality in North-Central Nigeria: a seventeen-year review. Afri. Jol Repd Health. 2005;69(3):27-40.

 

44. Ekane AD, Etuk SJ, Udoma EJ, et’al. What proportion of abortion seekers in Calabar are really pregnant? Tropical Jol of obstet and Gynaecol. 2005;22 (1):12-15.

 

45. Adaji SE, Bature SB,Nasir S, Avidime S. Uterine      inversion complicating traditional termination of  pregnancy: case report. Obstet & Gynaecol forum. 2005; 15 (4):25-26.

 

46. Joubert R. Prevalence of Chlamydia trachomatis in patients attending the termination of pregnancy clinic at Kalafong Hospital: research article. O&G Forum. 2004;14 (1):19-22.

 

47. Worku S, Fantahun M. Unintended pregnancy and induced abortion in a town with accessible family planning services. Ethopian Jol. of Health Dev. 2006;20 (2): 79-83.

 

48. Etuk SJ, Ebong IF, Okonofua FE. Knowledge, Attitude and Practice of Private Medical Practioners in Calabar towards post abortion care. Afri Jol of Repd Health. 2003; 7 (3): 55-64.

 

49.Ebuchi OM, Ekanem EE, Ebuchi OAT. Knowledge, and practice of emergency contraception among female undergraduates in University of Lagos, Nigeria. East Afri. Med. Jol. 2006;83 (3): 90-95.

 

50. Haggi D. Emergency contraception: A Global overview of knowledge, attitude and practice among providers. Tropical Obstet and Gynaecol. 2003;20:153-8.

 

51. Oye-Adeniran BA, Adewole IF, Umoh AV, et’al. Community based survey of unwanted pregnancy in South Western Nigeria. Afri. Jol. Of Repd Health. 2005;

 

52.           Kinoti SN, Gaffikin L, Benson J. How research can affect policy and programme advocacy: example from a three- country study on abortion complications in sub-Saharan Africa. East Afri. Med. Jol. 2004; 81 (2):63-70.

 

Correspondence:

Dr. Anyanwagu Uchenna Chidi

uceeanyanwagu@yahoo.com

 

Anyanwagu uchenna Chidi is an intern at the University of Calabar Teaching Hospital in Nigeria. He was the editor of the ABSUMSAJ- an international student-medical journal published in Aba, Abia State, Nigeria.

No related posts.